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The number one piece of advice I would give anyone who hasn’t had kids yet

Men and women are pressured, maybe equally, maybe women a little more to have kids. Once college is over and a career is started, a common question seems to become “when are you getting married?” Soon after marriage, the question that seems to come is “when are you having kids?”

It’s a concern a lot of women seem to battle with, for no real reason. Now, we have the ability to choose- whether using birth control, morning after, adoption and even abortion- women have choices about when or if they become moms.

It’s not a choice to make lightly. Many people do not want to be a parent, others give in to pressure and later regret. In reality, becoming a parent is a lifelong responsibility. It extends beyond the time they leave. You will always worry, want to see them as often as possible and want to spend time with grand kids.

The early years involve a lot of late nights, potty training isn’t smooth, you will grow comfortable with every type of bodily fluid (although I still have to ask my husband to clean up if someone pukes most of the time- just the smell alone can make me join in). When I was pregnant, I had to have other people change poop diapers due to my extreme sensitive smell and how prone I was to queasiness. (once again, unless I wanted to puke)

You can deal with colic, temper tantrums over everything, there will be times they don’t want to eat anything and times they only eat one food for breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks and you’ll deal with all types of bad but the good should outweigh the bad. You will feel a strong maternal bond, but not every woman feels it- even after kids. You will feel a strong love and bond and the good times will quickly outweigh the bad.

A lot of people try to justify the why behind why they want kids. To me, it sounds like they’re talking themselves into wanting instead of actually wanting to be a parent “just because.”

This is my opinion alone, I always wanted to be a mommy. I wanted to be a career mommy (career and kids) and I never had a reason. Over the years, I read a lot and all the reasons people gave for having kids sounded more like they were trying to convince people or themselves they wanted something they were unsure of.

After looking at the realities of having kids, the numbers of women living in regret, I never give advice without being asked but if I was asked, I would always tell someone if they have a reason or a list of reasons to hold off on having kids.

What are your thoughts?

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I just got notified a few days ago it was my 1 year anniversary

I also just noticed I was on 99 posts, so this is my 100th post.

It took me 1 year to reach 100 posts. I’m thinking about challenging myself to make 1 new post a day and see if I can add 365 by this time next year.

I guess by my 1 year anniversary, I reached almost 100 posts and I hit 50 subscribers yesterday.

I’d like to thank everyone who has read, liked, commented, subscribed etc.